Now the birth of Jesus the Messiah took place in this way. When his mother Mary had been engaged to Joseph, but before they lived together, she was found to be with child from the Holy Spirit. Her husband Joseph, being a righteous man and unwilling to expose her to public disgrace, planned to dismiss her quietly.

    But just when he had resolved to do this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, "Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife, for the child conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will bear a son, and you are to name him Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins."

    All this took place to fulfill what the Lord through the prophet had spoken: "Look, the virgin shall conceive and bear a son, and they shall name him Emmanuel," (which means, God with us).

    When Joseph awoke from sleep, he did as the angel of the Lord commanded him; he took her as his wife, but had no marital relations with her until she had borne a son; and he named him Jesus.

    Today we hear that Mary was "engaged to Joseph," that she was found "with child from the Holy Spirit" and that therefore Joseph decided to "dismiss her quietly".

    We all have experienced similar events to the first and third items, being engaged or considering ourselves in relationships thought to be permanent and then separating. Some of us may have even been confronted by the unfaithfulness of the trusted partner, in whom we had absolute faith and confidence. It is even possible that even as this Christmas draws closer someone close to us will feel like Joseph; alone and disillusioned.

    Despite the crushing news of Mary’s apparent unfaithfulness, Joseph remained righteous. Though he faced personal tragedy, he was going to sacrifice his dreams, and face whatever the future held in order to protect the one he loved. Obedient to God’s law and protective of Mary’s dignity, Joseph was going to go away quietly. Or it may have been a more selfish motive, perhaps Joseph was afraid to face the memories that would remain.

    Some of us may be like Joseph, willing to leave quietly, sacrificing participation in church community and other cherished relationships just to protect the reputations of those loved, or else out of a feeling we just can’t bear to remain in those places we shared with the other, afraid to deal with the memories left behind.

    The number of reasons used to justify or rationalize our behavior is endless. But in reality what happens is we retreat into loneliness, deepening despair, embarrassment and depression. For some, it becomes so severe that the only solution is thought to be suicide.

    Some will hide in suffocating isolation, low self esteem and abusive relationships caused by excessive drinking of their self or significant other. Some endure rejection quietly because of their race, nationality or beliefs. Some live invisible lives, unwilling to confront their friends and families over their sexuality, choosing to endure anger and hurt out of fear.

    Like Joseph, regardless of the cause, the list of those limping with Joseph, suffering quiet agony, is endless.

    God will have nothing to do with Joseph’s quiet resignation. Through the angel God invites Joseph to remain with those he loves and to participate actively in the situations touching their lives. God pushes Joseph back to reality, to deal with his broken dreams, fears and pain. God calls Joseph to faithfulness.

    God calls us too to participate with faithfulness and perseverance in the midst of our imperfect relationships. God supports us as we struggle to be the people of God at times and in places that appear unredeemable.

    Just as God called Joseph to live faithfully in a situation that seemed less than ideal, God promised to be with him. God promises to be with us also.

    During this Advent Season, may we hear God’s word calling us to be present and to live life trusting as Joseph that we will not be abandoned. Let us rejoice and sing "O come, O come, Emmanuel" and fully expect God to be with us.